Top 10 Reasons Your Dog Deserves to be on Your Christmas Gift List

#10. He’s seen you naked, but still respects you.
Honestly, how many people can you say that about? Seriously. Your dog sees you at your worst, pre-shower, pre-makeup, pre-everything that makes you look presentable, and still looks at you like a deity. Or at least, keeps the chuckles to a minimum.

#9. He’s content with being your fallback.
Who is always there for you when you’re date doesn’t show? Who is waiting for you happily after he’s been ignored because of your busy social life? Who else would be thrilled to have you show up even though you’ve done everything in your power to find something else to do? Even when you come home after a horrible break-up, vowing to never love again, your dog is happy to teach you to do just that.

#8. He keeps you from getting a fat butt.
That’s right. If you didn’t have to spend all that time taking your dog for walks, you’d likely be sitting around on your lazy bum. Sure, it seems like a drag when it’s ten degrees outside and your pooch is scratching at the front door, but your 24-hour personal trainer knows what’s best for you. Get moving!

#7. He helps you to think about someone besides yourself.
Ever spent much time with someone who doesn’t like dogs? What do they all have in common? Complete self-absorption. I don’t like dogs because they’re messy. They smell. They take work. They always want attention. I’m too busy. Thanks to your four-legged friend, you’re not like those people. Your dog is a living, breathing reminder that the world is more than just you.

#6. He’s impossibly cute.
Sure, you sometimes take it for granted. Memories of his puppyhood may seem thousands of miles away, and you often find yourself too busy to notice. But then you happen to look down from your whatever “important” thing you’re doing and see those adorable eyes staring up at you, and you just can’t deny it. Your dog has more cute than a thousand Bambi movies.

#5. He takes you places.
How often have you been introduced to a new experience just because of your dog? I’ve met lots of new friends, seen tons of new places and found scads of new activities merely because of my relationship with my dog. There’s nothing like starting a conversation with a complete stranger in a park because your dog is vigorously sniffing said stranger’s privates, is there? (It’s true. How many romantic comedies use that exact same scenario?)

#4. He’s your excuse.
Just as he gives you a reason to get out and see the world, he also can be your excuse to stay in. “I have to rearrange my sock drawer” just doesn’t cut the mustard anymore. If you claim to have an obsessive-compulsive dog at home who will eat through your refrigerator door if you don’t feed him by precisely 7pm, that is strangely more plausible.

#3. He reminds you that there is still good in the world.
It’s easy to forget. People cut you off in traffic. Some creepy guy stares at you non-stop in the subway. Your boss is a jerk. Your cab driver overcharges you. It’s enough to want you to shut the world out and hide on your couch all day. But when you get there, you’re greeted by someone who thinks the world of you, and who only wants to make you happy (oh, and maybe a nibble of whatever it is you’re eating).

#2. He always gets the shaft.
Sure you may have nabbed the milk-bone with the bow on it at the supermarket checkout last year, but is that all that your constant companion is worth? You’ve spent more on a random holiday gift pool at the office than on gifts for your dog, haven’t you? What about a warm dog bed to get him up off the floor? Maybe a new dog collar and leash that doesn’t look like every other one? Some cute dog clothes that (almost) match your dog's level of cuteness? How about a new dog toy that will remind him (and you) what it’s like to be a kid again? (OK, shameless plugs are now over).

#1. Life is too short. Especially in dog years.
Though he’s in it for the long haul, it always seems too short. If you’ve ever lost a beloved dog to old age, you know that no matter how long you’ve had with him, it seems like you could have done more. More walks. More playing. More doting. When it’s all over, do you think you’ll wish you’d spent more time working and worrying? Not likely.

You know what you need to do? Go home and spend time with your best friend. Thank him for everything. He may not understand every word, but he understands your heart.

For Cat Lovers Who Speak in TXT

I've had this site in the pet links section of the site for a few weeks, but just wanted to point it out in case you hadn't noticed. ICanHasCheezburger.com is a huge online rage right now, thanks to it's "lolcats."


The site is composed of oddly entertaining and captioned images, mostly about cats, and almost always hilarious. I think a study needs to be done on why the site is so hilarious. Really. I'm actually a bit concerned about myself for laughing so much while spending entirely too much time reading grammatically incorrect captions on silly cat pictures. Why? Why do we laugh so much?

Seriously. Visit. Now.

Cat Wakeup Call

Sorry for the double video posts, but I can't resist with this one. I used to have a cat that would knock my radio off of the shelf above my head to wake me up. This is too true!

Funny Pet Vid: Pug Takes a Pounding for Treats

Watch through to the second half. That guy will not give up! Quite the brutal cat and pug confrontation, though I think the cat may have just been trying to help the pudgy pooch lose weight.

Man Dies After Getting Stuck in Girlfriend's Cat Door

If I was found in this situation, I'd probably die of embarrassment if I didn't die from whatever actually killed this guy. Especially if the story is then picked up by Fox News.

$25,000 Ashera Cat a Hoax?

There's been lots of interest among our readers, and online in general, generated around the new Ashera cat breed. Maybe it's that it can cost almost $25,000. Maybe it's that they weigh up to 30 pounds. Maybe it's that they look so cool. Maybe it's that they're apparently partially African and Asian serval wildcats. Or maybe, it's because Ashera is a big fat fraud?

I just dug up an old blog post (on a blog that seems to have been abandoned) about the striking similarities between the new Ashera cat (being hawked by Lifestyle Pets) and the well-established Savannah cat, which became a pedigreed breed back in 2000.

The blogger posits that the Ashera is nothing other than a 2nd generation ("F2," 2 generations from serval) Savannah cat that is non-pedigreed. As in, inferior, in the blogger's mind.

So, I dug a bit more and found some other info. The Museum of Hoaxes seems to be convinced it's real, but I think their research was just reading Lifestyle Pets' press release.

I came across several breeder sites and I think their F2 Savannah cats look almost identical to the (admittedly better photographed) Ashera cats on Lifestyle Pets. Is it a coincidence that Lifestyle Pets want to keep the lineage of the Ashera cat secret?

So, at least for now, I think I'm going to say that the Ashera seems to be nothing more than slick marketing of a non-pedigreed Savannah cat. Still neat, but not worth the $22,000+ that Lifestyle Pets is selling them for.

New Find: Dogs in Duds

Found a pretty darn cute website this morning: Dogs in Duds. It's a regularly updated blog full of user-submitted photos of, well, dogs in duds. Get your dog clothes, get your camera, and get cracking!

India Man Marries Dog

You think you love your dog? That's nothing! A man in India has actually married a dog in a full, traditional Hindu ceremony. But this time, he promises not to kill the pooch. You see, he's marrying the dog as what he believes to be atonement for killing two other dogs in a rather gruesome fashion 15 years ago. Since then, his life has gone downhill. It's the result, he says, of a curse. Marrying this one (and presumably not killing the poor thing) will fix his bad mojo, or juju, or whatever.

So why should this poor dog now be cursed to be married to this guy? I'm just asking.

My I recommend the pearl dog necklace as a wedding gift to help cheer her up?

South Florida: Giant Toads Can Poison Dogs

Since lots of our readers live in the Sunshine State, we bring this alert from WESH, the Orlando NBC affiliate. Giant toads, introduced in the 1950s to combat sugar cane pests, produce a sizable amount of poison from glands all along their bodies. The toads can grow up to 5 pounds, and have been known to kill dogs that tangle with them. Typically, the dog will attempt to bite them, but are in for a surprise.

Lou May's dog found a cane toad in his Palm Harbor back yard. "She comes in and she is foaming at the mouth," May said.

So not only are they ugly, but they're dangerous. Look out!

Genetically Engineered Ashera Super-Cat to Face Genetically Engineered Fearless Mouse

Tokyo researchers, who have apparently learned nothing from their run-ins with genetic misfits such as Godzilla and Mothra, have been tinkering with mother nature yet again. Cats everywhere take notice: there are mice afoot that no longer fear you.

The above article contains all sorts of interesting scientific tidbits, making all of this sound well and good, and in the support of austere scientific inquiry. All of this is merely a diversion, however, from the reality that this group of scientists is seeking to create a genetically bred mutant army of mice capable of fighting for good against the evil of the genetically engineered Ashera super cats.

Automatic Waterboarding Dog Bath Keeps French Dogs Fresh

From the nation that produces more types of cheese than able-bodied soldiers: The automated dog spa. Watch the video for a demonstration, complete with a concerned pet owner joining his pooch inside. Wait a second, isn't the whole point of this thing to keep you from getting soaked while trying to give you dog a bath?

Perhaps more importantly, is this waterboarding technique allowed under the Geneva Conventions?

Rescuing Sprite: Radio Host Mark Levin's Book on Loving and Losing His Dog

National Review (no hissing, please!) has a great interview with popular radio talk show host Mark Levin on his recent book, Rescuing Sprite. The book sprung from an essay he wrote immediately after the loss of Sprite, his Spaniel mix.

Levin is mostly known as a respected constitutional lawyer and radio show host, it's clear that he is first and foremost a dog lover. It's hard not to get a bit choked up with him as he speaks of dogs' love for us:

I think there is something special about dogs. There’s a special connection or bond between humans and dogs. It’s as if dogs exist to bring people happiness. They teach us about life, loyalty, joy, trust, responsibility, and laughter. They help us clear out all the clutter that surrounds our busy lives and focus on what’s really important. They tell us it’s okay to take time to play sock-pull or have a catch, make silly noises, and enjoy yourself despite all the pressures we adult humans have (to) deal with. Let me put it this way: Dogs are not pets. Dogs are family.

It's interesting that though there are so many things that people get so worked up about (I'm sure our readers will not be too keen on the the articles mentioning of Mark's friendship with Rush Limbaugh and how Limbaugh helped Levin through the grieving process), dogs are one of the few things that we can all agree about. They're truly a gift to humanity, and it's a blessing to have them.

I'm going to go out and grab a copy post haste. I'll hopefully have a review up in the next few days.

UPDATE: Check out Mark Levin's website dedicated to Sprite, which has a spot where you can share and read dog stories.

Diamond Studded Gold Dog MP3 Player for Pampered Pooches

For those of you who simply cannot get enough doggie bling, Innobitz now offers JooZoo, a gold, diamond encrusted MP3 player. For just $2000, you can equip your pooch (or genetically engineered Ashera super-cat?) with audio clips that play in response to certain behaviors. That way, you never actually have to respond to your dog when she does something good.

If you've just got to adorn your dog with jewelry, may we suggest going with something a bit more regal, like the classic black pearl dog necklace? Sure, it doesn't substitute for a relationship with your dog, but what's the point of having a dog anyway?

We're just saying.

New Asian Dog Cafes: Dining With, Not On, Pets

A new Wall Street Journal article highlights some changes afoot in the Far East. The piece, Asians Get Passionate About Pets, was not in the culinary section of the WSJ, thankfully.

In a nearby neighborhood, another type of restaurant serves a traditional Korean dish of dog soup. While Mr. Huh thinks that these days more Koreans regard dogs as pets rather than meals, eating dogs "is a part of our food culture."

Mr. Huh is the owner of one of several new establishments cropping up throughout Tokyo and elsewhere. In trendy urban areas, new cafes allow customers to dine with resident cats and dogs. The restaurants cater to those who don't want the responsibility of owning a pet, but want some feline or canine interaction.

Sounds so Upper East Side, but yet...

Pet cafes like Bau House aren't to everyone's taste. They are not, generally, the most hygienic of places. At the Bau House, the dogs poop on the floor and lick the tableware, cups and dishes, staying one step ahead of the cleaning staff, who are prompt and thorough.

Tasty!

Read the whole thing here.

Pet Halloween Costume Super Mega Video Post

Aaaaahhh...it's over. The annual orgy of candy, costumes and... over-the-top pet cuteness. I've plunged the Series of Tubes for he best costumed pet videos available and put them here in a handy-dandy post to ease your post Halloween hangover.

They will never know I am there until I am close enough to strike!!!


The most patient pups in the world. How do they stay still under such humiliation???


Shorty the (actually longish) hot dog:


Winston and Rudy Prepare for Halloween, consisting almost entirely of a guy cramming a poor cat into nylon pantyhose. Sigh.


TLC's Halloween Pet Parade for Charity:


For some reason, cats just have to occupy a spot on whatever is distracting you from them. My cat always must lay on the newspaper why I'm reading it. This guy has adapted to the post-Halloween reality.


OK, these cats aren't in costume (nor would any self-respecting cat want to be, that's for those silly dogs!), but these cats are having a ball on Halloween in "The Cat Diaries: Halloween Special."