Genetically Engineered Ashera Super-Cat to Face Genetically Engineered Fearless Mouse

Tokyo researchers, who have apparently learned nothing from their run-ins with genetic misfits such as Godzilla and Mothra, have been tinkering with mother nature yet again. Cats everywhere take notice: there are mice afoot that no longer fear you.

The above article contains all sorts of interesting scientific tidbits, making all of this sound well and good, and in the support of austere scientific inquiry. All of this is merely a diversion, however, from the reality that this group of scientists is seeking to create a genetically bred mutant army of mice capable of fighting for good against the evil of the genetically engineered Ashera super cats.